Save this article to read it later.
Find this story in your accountsSaved for Latersection.
Even theBrooklynandManhattanBridges have declared their allegiance to opposing dragon queens.
They span the kingdom from Bushwick to the Upper West Side.
A kingdom pulled violently atwain!
But I couldnt choose a side on vibes alone.
The guy who takes my order asks, Which hat do you want?
My order is ready a few minutes later, and I am shocked to see my bagel is green.
Its brighter thanChappell Roan green, but deeper thanBratgreen; its St. Patricks Day food-dye green.
The iced matcha just reminds me that I dont like matcha.
They shouldve at least called it Dragons Piss to keep on theme.
I look around, and none of the other ten or so customers are eating a green bagel.
Youre gonna have a shit ton of hats, then, he says.
Correct me if Im gravely wrong.
I sidestep the dine-in line and order the Vhagars Pie at the takeout window.
A medium is $29.99 cash or $31.16 with credit card.
While Im waiting, I Google Vhagar.
I wonder if the character is Italian-coded, and thats why they paired him with pizza.
I toss the crust, because I still have six more Westerosi delicacies to try.
Spice:5/10Value:Expensive but delicious ($40 after tax and tip … for a medium!
This Alicent must be a real class act.
!Im overjoyed by this.
I order the Dragonstone Delight for $19.95, and she says, I had a hunch.
The sheer amount of smoked salmon and tobiko in this thing immediately justifies the price tag.
Tobiko is too small of an egg to be dragons eggs (maybe dragon ova?
), but they add a fun, savory-boba popping texture.
Im wondering why theres no spice on this, and then it hits me:The salmon is smoked!
Its smoky!Theres something so satisfying, creative, and logically sound about spicyandsmoky both signifying dragon.
Like, youre telling me adragon smoked this salmon?
My first exposure to Rhaenyras camp suggests a sophisticated regime, valuing tradition and prosperity.
I will not maintain this position for long.
The hot dog comes with a little extra dragon heat in the form of a spicy jalapeno crunchy topper.
Oh, and a hat.
This one, like the two I got at Murrays, says, The Rightful Heir.
Its very Kendall Roy and would make a nice gift for an eldest daughter.
I wonder what food goes into a recession special in Flea Bottom.
Someone on the 2 train to Brooklyn relinquishes his seat to me, which is very nice.
Otherwise, I wouldve spilled pizza and hatseverywhere.
I dont know if they read as Canadian to me.
If anything, #TeamBlack is more Quebecois.
He tried to explain further, but honestly, I couldnt follow.
The food arrives 15 minutes later, and the presentation is truly above and beyond.
The burger has a Targaryen sigil branded into the bun with a giant steak knife stabbed into the top.
The cheesecake is paired with a ladyfinger that says #TeamGreen.
The poutine … is indeed green.
Everything tastes good here.
The burger is pink inside and is topped with crispy jalapenos.
Jackson detects some heat that I dont.
I eat way more of it than I should this far into my journey.
Your mileage may vary, but I really like a saucy fry.
And those Valyrians know cheesecake; the caramelized burnt sugar keeps it on theme.
I do have one note: There was a real missed opportunity in not including anyMontreal smoked meaton theHOTDmenu.
At least the chicken was smoked, though.
Our servers excitement about the whole #TeamGreen thing is infectious.
At the end of our meal, he brings out three hats one for each menu item we ordered.
Jackson selects one that says Dracarys.
One of them is just straight up the Rays logo.
Note to self: take a stab at find where Justin Theroux has this tatted on his own body.
It says 120, but it feels like thousands.
I know its been more than that.
My fingers are pruning!
I pick the one I dont already have three of.
Thats our last Bastard!
Its not making a convincing case for Rhaenyras abilities as a ruler.
Plus, the tavern wenches under her governance are overworked and have a headache.
Bold to put up flags in Bushwick in June that arent rainbow, but okay.
To prove its loyalty, Robertas offers a Slice of the Seven Kingdoms for $6.75.
Are people really that obsessed withHouse of the Dragon?
asks the woman behind the counter.
I had no idea!
Im gonna watch the show now.
A guy in his early 20s whos about to place an order says, Im obsessed!
The Slice of the Seven Kingdoms features smoked mozzarella, Calabrian chili, basil, and Tellicherry pepper.
A poor final outing for #TeamBlack.
The crowd is an inverse of Rays: 60:40 guys to girls.
Everyone looks like they work in marketing.
Its giving off the vibe of a louche dentist-office waiting room.
Its also very strong, but the green-juice aspect makes ittastehealthy.
Its Fuck Dignity, I Want Revenge.
Can I swap out for a Fuck Dignity, too?
Folks, its like my fifth Rightful Heir hat.
I bequeath them the hats, crowning them my rightful heirs.
Its a cute extra touch to say a dragon burnt a lime slice for a garnish.
But overall, its a fun promotion.
Did it convincemeto watch the show?
I think I just dont like dragons that much?
Maybe if it were a show about dogs or something.
That would be so cute!
