Save this article to read it later.
Find this story in your accountsSaved for Latersection.
Points will be awarded for any or no reason.
Every week cant bea dragon fight.
There has to be a buildup and an aftermath.
Thats what makes the dragon fights so fun, the path to each that culminates in fire and screeching.
Well, we are back on that path now.
We are back to the politics and scheming, the council meetings and the sneaking around.
There is still some screeching, though.
Mostly from me during those shots that lingered on Aegons seeping wounds.Blech.
Aegon is kind of alive.
Hes in bad shape, though.
Alicent, as usual, is not feeling too great about it all.
Well get to that soon enough.
Time to give out points.
.Rhaenyra Targaryen: 6.5 points
.
Yes, I am implying that.
Did you see the little twinkle in her eye at the very end?
We appear to be screaming toward a situation that can best be described as randos on dragons.
I have never been more excited for anything in my entire life.
I hope we get a full-on music montage of people learning how to fly dragons.
I will come to the set and direct it if I have to.
.Alicent Hightower: 3 points
Alicent is going to explode soon.
I dont see any way around it.
In fact, Im surprised it didnt happen already.
There is very little that could have surprised me in that moment.
Shes a time bomb now.
I mean that honestly.
Subtext is overrated sometimes.
Gimme that text, baby.
That was, to use a technical term in television criticism, puke city.
I had been trying so hard to avoid this.
Daemon Targaryen: 0 points
THERAPIST: Okay, where do you want to start this week?
DAEMON: It was a mixed couple of days.
THERAPIST: How so?
THERAPIST: And why are they mad?
DAEMON: I dont know.
THERAPIST: …
DAEMON: Yeah, theyre being stupid.
THERAPIST: Daemon, I think we need t
DAEMON: Oh, and I had another vision.
THERAPIST: Lets stay with these angry people.
Shes kind of like if a Beyonce song were a character on a television show.
I hope she and Jacaerys have a dozen kids with her personality and his little mop of hair.
Some of them can be blonde.
This is the only hope for the realm.
This is rude behavior by the host on a number of levels.
Think about how annoyed youd be.
You would be within your rights to scream and heave that bag of cheeseburgers right into the wall.
I hope Alicent hits him with a melon.
.Corlys Velaryon: 1 point
Hes very sad about Rhaenys.
I am sad, too.
But hes going to need to get it together.
This is part of the deal when you have a badass nickname like the Sea Snake.
Theres a burden of responsibility there.
I think the pep talk from Baela will get him there, though.
I, on the other hand, will keep being sad about Rhaenys.
I do not have the burden he has.
Im not the Lord of the Tides.
Im not even the Lord of the Creek Across the Street.
There are geese there sometimes.
Those suckers are mean.
Ill stay over here, thats their creek.
.Jacaerys Velaryon: 7 points
I am still thinking about that music montage I mentioned earlier.
I think Jacaerys should be the one training the new dragon riders.
What have I gotten myself into?Kind of like if Gene Hackmans character inThe Replacementshad Timothee Chalamets cheekbones.
This is a reasonable request.
.Helaena Targaryen: 5 points
Helaena is good at lurking.
This is a useful skill on this show.
.Mysaria: 8 points
A few things here:
Mysaria is now my favorite character.
Thats going to be fun.
I do not care how it happens, but it does have to happen.
Let him sneak onto a ship and sail off to safety.
Let Alyn adopt him.
Have him bite Criston in the groin.
I can be flexible here.
But only to a point.
(2) Hugh takes action by shooting Aemond and Vhagar out of the sky.
(3) Aegon, now recovering and grateful, apologizes and pays him double.
(4) Hugh adopts the Ratcatchers dog and names it Scorpion.
(5) The presence of the dog helps Hughs child on the path to recovery.
(6) They buy a boat and sail to Tahiti.
(7) Hugh opens a beach bar that serves umbrella drinks.
Kokomo plays as we fade to black.
And then thats just the end of the show.
Unexpected series finale with a happy beach ending, books be damned.
God, people would be so mad.
I might never stop laughing.
.Alys the Witch: 7 points
I love her.
Just popping up here and there to feed Daemon potions and bandage his wounds while mocking him.
Part of me hopes shes not even real.
That would be great.
Less so for Daemon.
Take an hour to picture it if you want.
Its really a blast.
