Parishis giving one of Hollywoods greatest journeymen his long-deferred shot at antihero stardom.
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Thats just a sample of over 200 credits since the early 1980s.
As it turns out, both roles are important to him personally.
Ive been willing to be honest and truthful about myself when I look in the mirror.
Parish has lost most of his hope.
Hes losing his house; hes losing his business.
What specific trauma are you drawing on?I went bankrupt while I was living in Connecticut.
How bad did things get for you?I was thinking about suicide because I was well insured.
This is a film-noir plot.It is.
And I think that might be a film I have to make.
But this brings me to questions: What is the heros journey like?
And what is a real, true hero?
That heros journey is important for us all.
But I realized that the heros journey is apersonaljourney.
Its not like the journeys you often find in fiction.
What is the heros journey in reality?The world today is a society of immediacy.
Youve got to make it happennowwhen they call for you to pay the bills.
The phones ringing, and if you cant pay the rent, youve got 30 days to get out.
But were also in a society where certain things look a certain way and people think theyarethat way.
I practice being able to hide.
The process becomes second nature.
I dont have to convince you that Im good at being Gus Fring or Moff Gideon or Gracian Parish.
So I have actors trauma!
Parishis more life-size than a lot of the other characters youre known for.Yes.
And I should step back a second to talk about the Everyman.
I applaud him for that, you know.
He can wield the dark saber.
He can fly the TIE fighter.
What about that appeals to you?Hes competent.
And then we have Stan Edgar, the character I play onThe Boys.
He knows hes a company man, and thats whats going to win in the end.
And notice that hes an adult babysitter: Part of him hates that.
But all these characters, once I started to think about them, seemed to me larger than life.
I tell my children, You have to validate yourself.
You have to, really, and its hard.
Theyre young; theyre in their 20s.
Their world is unsafe and unsure.
I mention my children because I learned a lot from them, now that Im able to hear them.
Hearing with your heart is different than hearing just with your ears.
Hes losing them because what he doesnt really get is that they needhim.
They need him to communicate with them and be in connection to them.
But hes becoming more and more distant because the pressure is choking him.
Its about this over-the-hill boxer.
You know, Just one more fight.
He has no energy, and hes getting the crap beat out of him.
Theres no way youre going to win.
All the odds are against them.
And I also think a lot aboutD.O.A., the original version from 1949, with Edmond OBrien.
A story that puts a clock on a mans life.Yeah, yeah!
Thats the central question characters ask themselves in these noir movies that we also get into onParish.
[In the hard-boiled yet searching style of film-noir voice-over] Am I a good man?
I have done bad things.
And Im afraid to tell you, my family, about what Ive done.
And I seem to now be returning to that.
Because I want to help put food on the table, save the business.
Im ashamed to say where the money came from.
How do I live with myself?
I would bet that everybody with any kind of conscience thinks about those issues.I would think so.
You may pretend you dont see it, even if you feel it a little bit.
I think thats kind of the way society is going.
Im trying to build a character in Parish who really feels all that.
A man in turmoil, in distress.
Its that man, that woman, that is about to break.
God knows we dont want to be anywhere near them when they do.
Is Parish that far down, in your opinion?Parish has self-awareness, but hes lost his faith.
Hes lost that hope that God is going to bail him out or save him.
Is it true that you once considered being a priest?It is true.
I went to Mount St. Joseph Military Academy in Newburgh, New York.
I went to Catholic schools, parochial schools.
I was trained as an altar boy by priests.
I was also around monks as well.
So that dedication to something became important to me.
Id frankincense the church.
Id pour the priests their wine.
There was poetry to it.
There was an organist.
What did those rituals do for your development?They allowed me to feel soothed.
I also felt like they helped other people.
It was a big part of my life for a long time.
I started to see that they were human.
They were trying to perhaps live a beatific life.
They were human beings trying to become uplifted and be saintly.
Some were hiding behind the vestments for the sake of others.
I do it myself.
Everybody does.This brings us back to the idea of masks.
and she looked at me and said, Stop with the fake laugh.
And I went, Wow!
So now I bust myself when I catch myself performing around them.
Its so great when your kids can understand you in that way.
My kids, they see through me.
I mean,throughme.Ive got four daughters, and they see through me, too.
The more real I get, the more they feel me, and the more I can share.
I mean, what do you think?
Do they owe you?
My kids?Yes.
Do your kids owe you anything?
If anything I feel like I owe them for all the shit I put them through.How about that!
I was in a restaurant with my girl in California one day and asked for the check.
There was no check.
I had met someone on the way in who acted like she knew me.
I dont know if I ever knew her.
Turns out the check was paid for by that table.
I wondered why I felt awkward.
It was just a thank you for my work.
But what allowed her to feel like she should pay for my meal?
Was it a gift?
It all brought up this feeling that I dont want to owe anybody anything.
It also made me think of another question, which is, When are we able to accept help?
I have this other show, calledThe Gentlemen, from Guy Ritchie.
I play one of the richest men in the world.
That embarrassing thing where you just cant afford things.
I can remember moments with my mother and brother of eating franks and beans out of a can.
Heating the can up on the stove.
That was really dire.
He knows everything about English history, more than some Brits.
But its that financial freedom with which he speaks.
What he says is very beautifully gracious and measured.
He can tell stories.
He has no worries, no cares.
Actually, he does: He wants something.
But what I mean to say is hes not in that pressure cooker where Parish lives.
Now Im getting bespoke clothing made for me to play a character.
I am so privileged and lucky to be able to do a thing like that.
Im able to pretend to be more than I am.
Holy shit!That is a powerful line for me.
Im tired of being a passenger in my life.
I have ideas I want to share.
I want to share more with you.
I want to give more.
Is that why youve played a lot of characters who are control freaks?
The fear of what will happen if you allow yourself to be the passenger?Thats right.
But its not possible to control everything.
you might only appear to.
There is no win.
There is no lose.
Just showing up is enough, and acknowledging that you just did what you could today.
