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Have you climbed aboard?
Have you hoisted the sail?
Have you checked into your stateroom?
That would be far too obvious for this kooky show.
Instead, a cheerleaders ponytail gets sucked into the hot-tub drain, pinning her under the water.
A shard of the drain cover has embedded itself in her neck, right by her carotid artery.
One is so nervous that her heart is racing nonstop and she cant sleep.
Shingle and Ready to MingleCapn Don Johnson has a case of the shingles!
To quote the Doc, Thats what we do on the Odyssey!
We take care of all your hot-tub needs.
She was never pregnant.
Her positive tests were due to a corpus luteum cyst on her right ovary that mimics a pregnancy hormone.
The throuple processes their grief and mixed emotions in the hot tub.
Tristan is sad because a baby, to him, represented a future with her.
Doc Odd shares a story about how he had bought a onesie with gender-neutral pineapples on it.
The whole episode is a Pippa Soo acting showcase.
Episode 12: Sophisticated Ladies Week
Shania Twain PREGNANT!Remember Singles Week?
When Canadian treasure Shania Twain gave Capn Don a case of Broken Heart Syndrome?
That was ten sailings ago, ergo ten weeks ago, and shes now ten weeks pregnant.
She surprises the Good Capn aboard the ship and springs the news on him.
He and Olivia end up unlikely roomies in the special quarantine wing.
In years past, I wouldve pulled two, three cougs a cruise, he brags.
Now, he just wants Avery.
But Officer Angela Bassettalsoends up stuck aboard the ship as it sets sail for international waters.
Its up to Athena and Doc Odd to track them down.
The woman says, Guess my luck has run out.
While her grandson sets off the fire alarm, she steals unattended jewels from the cabins.
Don Johnson exercises his Capns authority to call in their arrest to the LAPD and the Feds.
Gamblers LegOne guy has a blood clot from sitting at the slots for too long.
Blood thinners sort him out.
Avery decides to keep the baby but has yet to decide on a man.
Episode 10: Shark Attack!
Part 2: Orca!
Open-Cavity Flashlight TagWe start where we left off: power still down mid-surgery.
Monroe, this isnt the Navy.
You cant even walk!
But it ends up being the right call, because these tender moments are anything but.
But, of course, the orcas return and start to circle and jostle the tiny boat.
Oh, and the powers still off!
Doc Odd continues to flirt with Dr. Brooke Lane until they arrive at port.
Episode nine: Shark Attack!
And honey, Monroes leg isnt just Point Sprained or Point Fractured.
Nothing gets past her.
Its under these romantic circumstances that Doc Odd meets sexy trauma surgeon Dr. Brooke Lane.
His arm is done for too.
Were not equipped to do a double amputation!
She hooks them up with a comically large buzz saw to hack this poor guys arm and legs off.
Theywaste not want nothis disembodied legs pristine arteries and start surgery to graft them onto Monroe.
Up on the bridge, Capn Don John really takes a shine to the guy.
If the generator blows, itll take out the backups and cause an explosion.
So now Doc & Co. are doing surgery on a cruise ship without power, surrounded by violent whales.
Emotional Emergency of the WeekDr.
Brooke Lane is coming for our man Max Bankman.
Im not one of them.
But when Brooke emerges from Maxs bathroom, NP Avery misreads her post-surgery shower as post-coital.
(Apparently, this isa real trend on cruise ships.)
Case in point: Tristan and that hot chef hes been seeing get bacterial conjunctivitis, a.k.a.
pink eye, from floating in a pool full of ducks.
Who knowswhatelse they did with them.
Fred Melamed Is Eating CoinsYou heard me: Character actor Fred Melamed is eating coins.
Doc and Avery find 18 objects in total in his stomach, mostly metal, many of them pointy.
This is so gross that its actually the only guest emergency this episode has time for.
The next morning, Melameds sent to the hospital in port.
They need a vacation from all this vacation!
Episode seven: Oh, Daddy!
Bobs anactress,yall!
Were already dealing with disordered eating, but thats not their medical emergency.
They got carotenosis from too many sweet potatoes, and, separately, mono caused the rash.
Doc Odds cure consists of a nutrient drip, anti-nausea drugs, and activated charcoal.
In Stamoss case, its been converting his blood sugar into ethyl alcohol.
The cure: IV full of nutrients and antifungals, and love and acceptance from his big brother Don.
Coming out of avagina!
But Avery found it hot and exciting and wants to keep it up.
Will our trio find a sexy middle ground before next weeks mid-season finale?
She even boasts to doc about her new Riviera tan.
Doc Odds oratorical power did the trick!
In the meantime, hes got a cream.
And mate, adds Nurse Tristan.
no more pulling tail.
Later in the episode, its slowly revealed that the groom and the bride also have the ringworm rash.
We learn the next day that he had been battling with depression.
Its very sad, and the medical team provides counseling to the guests.
This leads our main trio to …
Emotional Emergency of the WeekHave a threesome because life is short!
Avery wants to perform.
Shes excited for an offshore excursion that involves hunting for old pirate treasure.
Hematohidrosis, akasweating blood,a rare mix-up of his fear/arousal response system.
As Riva lists off the components of her proprietary recipe, Doc Odd exclaims, This isnt cyanide poisoning!
Its not the almonds!
They fix Agnes right up with emergency dialysis.
Luckily Capn Don Johnson himself did not partake.
First Mate sobers right up with some espresso and all is well …
Appendicitis … at Sea!…
Heavy Metal Amy SedarisLet this be a warning to theLiver King!
Welles lands in sick bay with copper poisoning from eating too much raw organ meat.
They flush out her toxins via IV and by disembarkation shes right as rain.
Shes better than ever, actually!
She says the raw meat was Welless thing and serves Avery a cassoulet.
Luxury cruise ships IRL have medi-spas, but this sailing is all just people already Botoxed and bandaged up.
The olfactory system is incredibly regenerative, he says, unbothered.
He also gives her a Phantom of the Opera mask to wear in the meantime.
Ken: There are communities for that.)
This is all weirder than it looks on paper.
how?!?!).
Tristan must break the news to his mom that she has Huntingtons disease and has ten good years left.
She reveals that her grandpa died of Huntingtons.
She tells Tristan she wants to make amends for being a bad mother … Kelly has been drinking a health powder, a.k.a.
I spent so much money on this trip, I have to look pretty in a swimsuit!
They put her on potassium and electrolytes and the day is saved.
He takes her back to his gorgeous capn quarters (which has a fireplace!
and wines and dines her with some oysters.
Its triggered by emotional stress brought on by the loss of a loved one.
You know what the worst thing for our heath is?
But you gotta muddle through anyway.
Beautiful words of wisdom from the doctor.
She took work on a fishing boat off the coast of Mexico, but there was an accident.
I felt very attacked by this episode.
Emotional Emergency of the EpAvery hates Singles Week because relationships are not her thing.
And at the end of the day, Im alone, adrift, with nothing to show for it.
Im never gonna be a doctor.
This is all there is for me.
Pumping peoples stomachs when they eat too much shrimp and flings with loser douchebags on singles cruises.
Shout-out to the shrimp OD mention.
Nurse Tristan makes her feel better by kissing her.
Hes presenting with an allergic reaction to antibiotics, only he isnt on any.
Waterslide Throat KickSeemingly immediately after OD-ing on all-you-can-eat shrimp, Mr. and Mrs. Dratch find themselves in another emergency.
Doc Odd goes against protocol, though, and saves this schmos life a second time in one night.
Man Overboard!By emergency No.
4, you start to learn a bit about how this shows structure will work going forward.
Medical situations escalate in severity and grow more serious in tone over the course of an episode.
thing, and immediately topples overboard.
Capn Don Johnson is alerted at the brig (terminology check?)
and orders the ship to drop buoys, informing us that only 15 percent of overboard cases survive.
All in a sailings work for Doctor Odyssey.
Dr. Odyssey immediately turns around and makes out with her.In Tristans face!
Correction: A previous version of this story misstated Avery Morgans title.
She is a nurse practitioner.
